otocol called PGP-Y, which stands for Pretty Good Parapsychology.
The mechanism is simple. You imagine that you've transmitted data to someone; that person then imagines that he or she has received that data. Using PGP-Y, any type of information can be transmitted over the Internet with complete security.
The key is that the data is transmitted high over the network -- so high that it actually travels above the network. The data is also transmitted telepathically. For those who mistrust electronic funds, there's also a
scheme for transmitting cash and gold plate telekinetically, but that won't be commercialized until sometime in the future.
Net Abuse: Announcing Project Whacko
On some days, the surge of unsolicited junk mail inflicted on e-mail users everywhere seems to reach epic proportions. Some of it comes from banditos who use fake sending addresses that are difficult to trace. Inspired by such incidents, we announce the creation of Project Whacko, an ongoing research effort to induce electronic junk mailers to whack themselves out of existence. We will publish and disseminate the best techniques users come up with.
Here are the principles of Project Whacko:
1)
The goal of Project Whacko is to prune the population of indiscriminate junk-mailers.
2)
Project Whacko schemes will use judo/jujitsu principles to redirect the evil actions of electronic-junk-mailers back to the putrid perpetrators.
3)
Project Whack
o schemes will themselves never involve the sending of indiscriminate electronic junk mail.
Please send your responsible Project Whacko scheme to marca@improb.com.
Coming: Superfast, Cheap Boxes
Parallelized network computers based on obsolete hardware will change the way you compute while saving you money. The genius of the Internet CheapBox is that it takes piles of obsolete computers -- everything from 8088 machines to Mac Centrises -- and, through the magic of parallel processing, converts them into attractive, inexpensive, 5- by 5- by 5-foot jet-black Internet CheapBox cubes that run Java applets with 100 to 300 times the power of a Pentium PC.
CheapBox inventor Jarrod Charron has left his nominal employer (AT&T) to form a consulting company, CheapBox Enterprises, that will license this technology and assist Fortune 1000 companies in building their own CheapBoxes. The company plans to sell its own Internet CheapBox for about $350 through CompUSA,
Sears, and Staples. Tests of a preliminary beta version of the CheapBox 2000 show that the device lives up to its hype and is likely to significantly crimp sales of the low-cost, stripped-down workstations that traditional workstation vendors are currently planning.
Plugged Professionals
Occasionally seen posted in newsgroups: inquiries from computer professionals who want to be "plugged into" the job market. The problem is a lack of standards. There are no generally accepted plug specifications or cabling standards. If your organization has found or developed a proven set of standards, please get in touch with me.
Marc Abrahams is the editor of the Annals of Improbable Research. You can reach him at
marca@improb.com
.
Advances and Retreats in Computing
